Música, Poesia e Filosofia

Quarta-feira, Março 07, 2007

A year ago, on my 21st bday, I went to Hana, a japanese restaurant with a bunch of friends. I had mentioned it to Yannie, Gabe and Kat, and it was quite a surprise when I saw that Lauren and Emliy were also there, among other people.

I remember, so clearly, that I was absolutely touched by the fact that Kat had brought me a gift and a card. That left me speechless. That birthday was quite special, just because I wasn't used anymore to receive gifts, just for the sake of it, and it just blew my mind that someone that barely knew me brought me something. Simple, not really specifically connected to my personality, but something, nonetheless. I think it was the first time that I understood the idea that "the gesture is what really counts".

I read something that Marie wrote today, to Kat, and it made me cry. She was just so upset that life is normal again and that you don't even acknowledge Kat's death anymore. It's almost like it's absurd to be happy and it kinda doesn't make sense. I know how she feels, although I don't get upset about it. But every now and again I wonder where Kat is, what would be her projects if she were alive, if she would've taken my pictures by then. Stuff like that.

And now, a year after that night at Hana, one of my strongest memories of her is her expression, as I thanked her for the gift. Her expression was "This is what people do." Not in a sarcastic way, but in a "be-the-change-you-want-to-see" way. I miss you, Kat.